Bruce's Travel Journal
 2000

I've been home for about a month now, and it's been so wonderful just to sit in my own house and sleep in my own bed; sip my own coffee out of my own mug on my own porch and all the while petting my own dog. Praise God for these that have become among the most wonderful and satisfying pleasures of my life.

And it's amazing how a guy changes. It wasn't too long ago that I lived an entire two years without once unpacking my suitcase, loving every moment of it, and what a glorious adventure it was! And now here I am, absolutely craving the opposite - home.

But the day was so excellent. I rose early, wandered out to the porch with my Bible and scratch pad, and prayed for a good two hours. Then with the sun so brilliant, a workout and a nice, long run. What an absolute pleasure of a morning.

And the Lord so blessed me yesterday, too. It's so funny, but like most folks, I guess, you run around doing everything you can to seek God and follow His lead, and you're 99% sure you're hearing Him right and moving as He would have you move - but there's that nagging little 1% that's more than likely the enemy trying to discourage and distract. And boy, how that screams at a guy when he's tired. To quote Gary Cooper in 'High Noon,' "I was tired, and a guy can think all kinds of things when he's tired."

But in the middle of the day, completely out of nowhere, I was talking with a friend and she says, "By the way, I meant to tell you but I forgot - a couple months ago I was praying for you and the Lord showed me, -------." Without going into details, it was exactly what the Lord was leading me through - complete and total confirmation that I was in fact hearing the Lord correctly and He was in sovereign control. Here I was wondering if I was anywhere close, and come to find out, I'm standing right in the bull's eye.

It's hilarious - she's feeling bad that she forgot to tell me and two months had gone by. But if she had told me back then it would have meant nothing, where yesterday it meant the world. Is God in control, or what?!

I sat down and wrote on my note pad, "The Lord says to me today: 'Rest, My child. As you have sought Me, I have responded. Your times are in my hands. Rest.' " Praise the blessed Name of Jesus!

So in a couple hours I board my first plane of 2001, on my way to Lake Havasu City, Arizona, for my first outreach of 2001. What a blessing. Speaking of which, I'd better go pack! "Here we go again, Lord!"

         

Olathe, Kansas. I can't quite believe it - my last ministry event of 2000 is freshly in the bag, and it's all behind me now. It's been a marathon-and-a-half this year, and with all the extraordinary pressures that came at me, I can assure you, it's purely by the grace of almighty God and His faithfulness to redeem, that all that got accomplished was accomplished.

I've seen salvation in quality and quantity that blows the mind. I've seen the dead in Christ start bouncing off the walls. I've seen congregations revived, marriages restored, communities united. . . I've seen, I've seen, I've seen. Oh brother, what my eyes have seen. I'm blown away, Lord. What a privilege of a life you've given me.

So, by way of celebration, here I sit in a Kansas Comfort Suites with my CNN, a turkey sub, a donut, and a steaming cup of hotel coffee swirling about my ever-present Styrofoam cup. M-m-m-m - what a party!!!

My last event was a university. Oh how I love to minister Jesus to students. I always sit in the back doing the fly-on-the-wall thing as they come in, so full of life and expectation, bubbling all over the place, laughing and giggling and just plain enjoying.

I'll never forget, once I was flying home from I don't know where, and found myself sitting next to this girl, maybe 19 or 20. We chatted away the entire flight and through it all - this so struck me - she never once asked me, "So, what do you do for a living?"

We talked about the beach (she was so excited to be going to California and told me she had her bathing suit on under her clothes - the beach was her first stop), family, baseball, Europe, . . . We talked about everything under the sun except that one thing that us grown-ups (ugh!) tend to talk about more than anything else - work.

I was so impressed by that. The girl was so refreshing. I mean, it's always the first thing when you sit down next to a stranger - "So, what kind of work are you in?" Yuck!! Who wants to talk about work? All we do is work, and then that's all we talk about!

Anyway, I took a lesson from that girl and made a vow that day to never ever become a 'grown up,' if you know what I mean. Amen, and amen!

But the meeting this morning was really something that's hard to explain. Here I was, telling stories about Jesus that everyone knew and had heard 1000 times. But the response - the vulnerability, the softness of heart.

The meeting closed and some of the kids just sat there, some with tears, some holding each other, there was a group that came to the altar and spontaneously huddled together in prayer.

I talked with several of them as I moved toward the door, guys and girls with tears in their eyes, just thanking and thanking me, telling me how hungry they were for Jesus. I remember one girl, Kristin - she just stood there not saying anything, with tears streaming and a smile so big. It was wonderful.

I'll tell you, that's what it's all about - Jesus reaching into hearts, more and more, deeper and deeper. And as I stood in front of these kids, I couldn't help but wonder what God was going to do in and through some of their lives. I couldn't help but wonder if the next Billy Graham was sitting there, or whatever. I mean, here I was talking to the next generation of Christ's leaders - what a glorious way for the curtain to close on my 2000.

And with it all behind me, I get my big reward - sleeping in my own bed for more than a couple days in a row, starting tonight. Ha ha - you think I'm kidding? I'm serious! Glory to the living God!

But seriously - if there's a banner over the year for me, it's God's faithfulness. It has been 12 months of battles and trials, but through every stress and strain, consistently, without fail, over and over - God's faithfulness, God's faithfulness, God's faithfulness, redemption and faithfulness. Oh, praise His wondrous name.

And so, I thank You, Father. Oh, how I thank you. You have carried me this year - literally - no two ways about it - guiding me through valley after valley, Your rod and Your staff leading and comforting, protecting and providing, turning me left and turning me right. You are truly wondrous, Lord. I honestly don't know how I did it without You for so many years.

Yes, Lord, thank You for saving me. And Your faithfulness, Lord - Your faithfulness astounds me. This entire year, it's been my sustenance. "Your love reaches to the heavens, Your faithfulness to the skies." "I cry out to God most high - He sends from heaven and saves me; God sends His love and His faithfulness."

So again, thanks, Lord. You're amazing, and through it all, you've afforded me an amazing year. I love You, Lord. I love You. But for Your grace, I'm nobody going nowhere, Lord. But because of Your grace, through all of my stumbling, I can truthfully say, "I love You." Bruce.

         

New York, New York. Finally back on American soil, though a long way from home. What a shock to go from whales dancing in the bays of Cape Town to the firestorm of New York concrete and humanity. But such is my life these days - another day, another airport, another country, another city.

Had a bit of a warm-up, though - Saturday I woke up in a small upstate town, Saratoga Springs. It's fall and as the leaves change the countryside is ablaze with yellows and reds. It's a stunning time of year in this part of the country, and what a privilege to experience it.

So I got in my car and drove through the trees to a village named Corinth; stopped into Sara's Coffee Shop for a late morning breakfast. I realized that I've been traveling far too much lately when I asked the counter girl if the body of water across the road was a river or a lake, and she replied with a tone of "what planet do you come from?" saying, "That's the Hudson River." One of the geographical cornerstones of America, and here I am sitting next to it, and I don't even know it!

But it's so cool when the Lord does this - driving through the fall colors on my way back to Saratoga Springs and the meeting, He gave me a very specific message for the 400 or so who were waiting. He showed me how all the beauty I was seeing around me, more than ironically, was death - the dying of the leaves. He brought to my mind the scripture, 'unless a seed falls to the ground and dies, . . .' He brought to mind the picture of Himself dying on that tree. He brought to mind the phrase 'dying to self,' and how that's the key to everything of possibility and true living for me and Him within me. It's a kingdom dynamic - the beauty, the salvation, the redemption, resurrection, renewal - it's all founded in the dying. And as it was spoken, my goodness, to see the Lord speak into the people's lives. Oh how I love it when He does that!

So I drive down to New York City for some more ministry in Staten Island, and while I'm here, a coffee in Times Square, a pasta dinner in Brooklyn, and a dessert I couldn't even begin to describe in little Italy. What an amazing place, this city - like walking through a movie, like walking through history. It is undoubtedly man's greatest man-made creation on the planet. Funny that with all the traveling I've done, this is my first time.

But all things New York aside, it was good to get out and walk the streets. If there's one thing I know about ministry, it's that the day I lose touch with either of two things - the Lord or the people - that's the day I'm washed up. That's the day I become just another lifeless stream of pontificated platitudes that may be true but so what.

Praise God for His grace and for the many forms it takes, and the many ways it leads and manages me, keeps me in tow, keeps me in line. Sometimes it's the strength to get through a meeting where I'm so tired I could cry. Sometimes it's saving people in a meeting where I'm so awkward I could crawl under a chair. Sometimes it's a vital message as I drive through the forests of upstate New York. And sometimes it's a stroll through the Mecca of maces, where he whispers into my heart with every step, "I'm bigger than all of it put together, Bruce. Everything you see - it's not even a matchstick to Me."

"But the people, Bruce, oh how I love the people. Every last one of them, no matter who they are, no matter how much they seem to ignore me . . . Oh the plans that I have for them, Bruce, the desire I have for them, the longing in My heart . I love them, Bruce. Keep going - tell them how I love them. Tell them." Jesus.

         

Kruger National Park. South Africa. The Lord is so shockingly faithful, I almost can’t take it (but don’t let that stop you, Father!).

I was on the road with camera poised very early this morning, looking for game. I had my cup of coffee in hand and everything looked all set up for a day of good wildlife-in-the-bush fun. But I’ll tell you, through all the impalas, zebras, and giraffes I felt hungry in my heart, and very tired.

I ended up at an overlook where I could get out of the car and take in the Olifants River below me. Alone, looking out, I just started praying - I mean really praying like I hadn’t in a long while. It was like fresh water, and I realized that I needed to stop today and take a Sabbath - just spend the day with the Lord.

"But gee, here I am in the African bush and I paid good money for this, and it’s such a rare experience - how can I justify not using it to the max? It may be another year before I get to come here and see these things again."

And the Lord replies, "Just spend the day with Me, kid. You need it, and I’d like it. Just spend the day with Me."

So, unsettled about ‘squandering’ the money and opportunity I drove back to the camp, confident that the place would be empty (everyone with half a brain is out enjoying the animals!). With coffee, Bible, and this journal in hand, I found a bench tucked near the fence overlooking the river and bush below.

So I’m sitting here praying, and I see something move by the river - it’s a mama and baby hippo grazing. I couldn’t believe my eyes! Hippos generally stay submerged in the water all day long, coming out to forage at night. As many times as I’ve seen them, it’s only been this pair of eyes and twitching ears bobbing on the surface. So here I’ve given up on animals today and I get a show I’ve longed to get as many times as I’ve been out here.

And that’s not all - suddenly there was another one, and another, and another . . Mamas with babies - I’ve counted 9 in all, and they just keep coming and keep grazing right in front of my eyes. I’m sitting here enjoying one of the best animal shows I’ve ever had, and it’s been going on for more than an hour! I would have been driving around all day long using 100 rand worth of gas and never come close to this incredible show the Lord - and here’s the catch - is handing to me, privately, free of charge or effort of any kind. Just me and a pod of hippos frolicking on the river bank.

Oh my gosh!! Wow!!! A small herd of elephants has just come down. I can’t believe my eyes!

And here comes a herd of waterbuck as well. A-h-h-h-h-h-h!!!!

I can’t take any more. It’s the most incredible game viewing I’ve ever tasted!!!!

I’ve been sitting here for the longest time, stunned, overwhelmed. Not another soul anywhere around. And the Lord whispers, "When are you gonna get it, kid? I’m not trying to rob you of any fun - I’m trying to shower you with it. If only you would take me at My word - ‘But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.’

" It’s so incredibly simple. When am I ever going to learn to chuck all my supposed human wisdom out the door and just do what He asks me to do, and then stand back (like right now) and be utterly amazed!

PS You won’t believe it - the elephants are frolicking in the river like I’ve only seen in Tarzan movies, splashing and bellowing, babies and all. The hits just keep on coming!

         

Olifants Camp, Kruger National Park, South Africa. I've relocated. This camp is much older and, unfortunately, more populated. The sun has just set and I am overlooking Olifants River and the surrounding bush below. More hippos in this river - it's like they grunt and bark back and forth to each other (sounds a little too human, to phrase it like that). I've heard a couple other identifiable cries, and one highly identifiable roar. Yes, there's a lion prowling the river, quite close.

I'll tell you, that roar of his splits the atmosphere. It's a sound you just can't describe - an un-duplicatable mix of authority and threat, bigness and power. It's a sound no one would dare question. I saw two of them early this morning. They were strolling 'home' from feasting on an elephant carcass I could see deep in the bush. It's highly unlikely they would attack such a huge animal, so the old guy probably dropped over on its own and the lions figured, "Well, why not." As they passed, their stomachs were swollen thick and their faces stained crimson. What a sight.

Later in the day I came upon a huge bull elephant walking toward me on a dirt road. I've had this experience before and learned very quickly, if an elephant wants the road, you give it to him and then some. I remember last year one of these big guys surprised me over a rise. After a display of ear-flapping, roaring, and showing me his breadth, he suddenly charged my car, stopping just short. I'll tell you, I never knew a car could go so fast in reverse!

Anyway, here I was again today, facing what could have been the same elephant, or at least his big brother. There was no way I was going to mess with him, so the car went immediately into reverse - my way of letting him know I forfeit right off the bat. In the meantime I pulled out my camera for a few close-ups before he got really irritated. But as the story goes, for some reason this guy never got irritated. I could see that as he stood facing me, he was completely at ease. He took some slow steps forward and I backed off even more. Maybe that was what relaxed him - I don't know for sure.

But my problem was I needed to get on the other side of him, and for all I knew, he could want to back me up for another mile. So, feeling a little brave because of his ease, I decided to pull as far left as I could and give him the road to pass. Mind you, this was a one-car wide road, so whatever room there was wasn't much. But he seemed so relaxed, so I pulled left and here he came. I'll tell you, when he got within a couple steps of my front end, I stopped breathing. He was so incredibly huge!

But it was too late for me - any sudden move of mine and it's over. My window was down and he began to pass. My heart just froze! I thought I'd made a mistake as huge as he was. His smell filled the car - he was so close I could have reached out and touched him. Then he did an astounding thing - he stopped and turned his head to face me. I thought to take a picture but my hands were shaking too much to hold the camera (no kidding, there). I looked right into his eyes. I'd never looked into an elephant's eyes. I'd never even thought of it before. But there I was, face to face with this big fellow - eye to eye. There is a saying that the eyes are the windows to the soul. Here was this huge, hulking, terrifying animal, and remarkably, all I saw in his eyes was innocence, calm, almost curiosity.

Don't laugh, but it made me think of ET There was a moment when I thought he was going to lift his trunk into the car and smell me. I'd heard of elephants doing that to campers sleeping on top of their landrovers. But he didn't, and after what felt like forever, he turned and gently strode on his way and out of sight. Wow!

I'm an animal lover and have had lots of great experiences, but looking into that elephant's eyes up close like that - I can't tell you how or why, but it was very, very, very special. In fact, it just might rank at the top for me.

Wow, the Lord is so good . . . I felt that "what are you doing with your life, Bruce?" start to rise in me a bit today. It always comes in times like these - middle of the week, having fun when the whole world is at work, a guy my age, no family, no property, . . . Thank God it didn't last. Used to be a thought like that would send me into a week-long tailspin. But I thank God for my life. He's given me tremendous purpose, adventure, and He's provided for me through it all. He's got a plan - I just know it. If I just keep my eyes fixed on Him - don't look left or right - take Him at His word, and trust Him more and more - I just know He'll take care of the rest. I just know He'll see me through. I just know He has more for me. Besides, I'm so far out on a limb as it is, turning back isn't even an option. For me, it's forward or nowhere.

"Thank You, Lord, that You're so trustworthy. And thanks for the day - that elephant and all. I love You, Lord." Well, the hippos are barking, "Enough, already! Go to bed." So, it's lights out. If they would only quiet down during the night and let a guy get some sleep, for cryin' out loud!

Oh well, welcome to the bush.

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Mopani Camp, Kruger National Park, South Africa. Don't get excited, it's not nearly as primitive as it sounds. Nestled in the midst of bushveldt wilderness, there's every first world comfort in my rondoval hut a guy could ask for - even air conditioning, which I refuse to give in to, I'm proud to announce. Oh well, it's still a long way from Los Angeles.

Just on the other side of the wire fence is a world most of us only taste through our TV screens. As I sit writing I can hear hippos barking in the river below, a thousand bullfrog choir, an occasional hyena yelp or lion groan . . . I remember the last time I was here, witnessing a kill in the night by sound - it was wild - a sudden, violent scuffle, an agonized whelp, then silence. Silence like you've never heard silence. I'll tell you, you can watch the Discovery Channel all day long but it's a whole different thing when it happens right in front of you.

I love it out here - the African bush! It's off season right now and the camp is near empty. After being submerged in ministry and crowds the past week, the suddenness of the change can make a guy feel pretty lonely. Earlier as I watched the sun drop over the river, I had to fight it off a bit. I'm learning that it's a choice as well - I'm learning to praise God instead of indulging it. It's not so easy, but I do my best.

Then I was heading back to the rondoval (there go those hippos again), and out of nowhere I heard traditional singing. Thinking it was someone's radio, I followed it to the edge of the camp. It was coming from outside the fence - from the bush. And it wasn't a radio - it was live. I could hear clapping and celebrating and many voices, and I could recognize a couple of words - "hallelujah," "Jeso." It hit me that it was Sunday night, and I realized I was listening to a church service in the bush, undoubtedly a fellowship of the workers in the camp. I couldn't see any lights or anything - just the singing and celebration filling the night air - right out there with the lions and leopards and everything. Boy, what I would give to be out there dancing with them.

I sat in the dark at the fence's edge, listening and smiling. After what felt like forever it quieted, and I knew I had once again tasted one of those purely 'African' experiences. Brothers and sisters in the Lord, out there in the bush celebrating our Savior. It was breathtaking. And in the midst of my aloneness, it was like the Lord was showing me how completely surrounded I am by 'family.' How even out here among the elephants and wildebeest, He is alive and well. Even out here, He is with me. Praise His most magnificent Name!

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Tzaneen, South Africa. Settled into a little 'rondoval' thatched-roof cottage on an outlying farm. Very beautiful here; very tropical - lots of banana, tea, and avocado plantations. Just a moment ago there was a spider crawling across my bed so big I could almost see its smile. Like I said - tropical.

On the drive up I gave a woman and her baby, Violet and Virginia, a ride. Virginia is just 2 months old - the youngest of Violet's 5 children. They were standing on the road in the middle of nowhere. Violet had a bag of avocados and a second bag of I-don't-know-what. She could speak very little English, so conversation was slim. Her husband is named Joseph - a plantation worker. "How much money does Joseph earn, Violet?" I shouldn't have asked. "400 rand a month." That's 100 rand a week. In dollars, less than 20 bucks.

I'll tell you, the mix of heartache and anger that boiled up in me. Here's a guy working, no doubt, from dawn to dusk for R100 a week. R100 won't even fill my gas tank over here. How in God's name can a guy possibly care for his wife and family for R100 a week?!

Violet cleaned the plantation owner's house for extra bucks - R250 a month. Wow, (forgive my sarcasm) what a generous man this plantation owner must be! And there can be no doubt he sits in church every Sunday cradling his leather covered Bible. (Isn't there a scripture that says something about exploiting your workers? If I recall it's Isaiah 58 - the whole chapter!).

Ironically, as we pulled near town the plantation owner drove by. Violet recognized his car and smiled. He was driving a R200,000 Land Rover. I asked her, "Is the plantation owner good to you?" She smiled even bigger, "Yes, yes." "He's a good man?" "Good man."

And as the plantation owner relishes the cushy comfort of his Land Rover's leather seats, the living God weeps...
He weeps...
and He weeps...
and He weeps...

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Pretoria, South Africa. The Lord's fruitfulness in the last 6 days has been astounding. At every turn, salvation and healing to broken hearts.

It's a humbling thing to have a young girl come and ask for your help - having silently carried the hell of a rape at the hands of her brother's friend in the privacy of her heart for 2 soul-crushing years. Or another girl, a rape at the hands of her father 4 months ago.

To see them and hundreds like them receive Jesus, then plug them into counseling/discipling relationships where they can get the practical equipping to shake free of yesterday and reach forward into the fullness of what the Lord has for their tomorrow, confident in the security of eternal life and the hope of His restoration in this life.

I will not soon forget the one girl coming to me after 3 sessions and some one-to-one counseling, smiling from ear to ear and saying, "I feel so light in my heart for the first time." What price can a guy put on that? What amount of money could I possibly earn in a day that can out-value that?

And so with this week done, I move north to Tzaneen - a 4 hour drive. It will be a very different world up there - very rural, plantations and plantation workers. But if there's one thing I've learned, the human heart is the human heart, and the living God is the living God, and His desire to reach a redeeming hand into those hearts is more constant over the jagged lines of varying African culture than the rising and setting of Africa's sun.

So this afternoon I move into a very different arena and preach the very same truth, expecting the Lord to be the very same Lord. "He loves you." It will again and again be my message. "He gave His life for you." Jesus!

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Cape Town, South Africa. I have so many memories of this place - it has been of such significance in my life, it is always with a deluge of emotion that I come here.

I will never forget one New Year's Eve I spent here, in a friend of a friend's flat. It was on the heels of 3 months of intensive ministry. I drove about 10 hours down from Bloemfontien depending on a friend to house me, but this dingy, dirty apartment was the best she could do. All my Cape Town friends were out of town - it was holiday time and they were all with their families at their seaside cottages. So there I was, all alone in a strange place on the other side of the world, never feeling more abandoned and lonely in my life.

I remember I was exhausted from all the work, but more than that, so questioning of my choices in life. It's a funny thing, but as much as a guy knows that souls are the number one thing and that ministry is the most valuable work he can do, there's still the tug every time he hears a story of so-and-so moving ahead in his life, every time he sees someone younger than him pull up to a red light in a BMW, every time he gets a wedding invitation or a baby announcement; and in my case, every time he looks up at a movie screen and sees the guys he started out starving with playing the leads we all dreamed about over endless cups of coffee. It was all mixing together with missing my family terribly over Christmastime. With every light in the place out and the steaming summer winds blowing the neighbor's cooking smells through the tattered drapery, I remember watching the world celebrate the new year on this tiny, crippled TV set, and with every live shot of Times Square, my heart sank more and more, deeper and deeper.

I had picked up my mail earlier that day. In it was a cassette from a friend of mine back in LA Struggling for something to cling to I plugged it in, and there in the dark a singer named Marty Goetz began -- The love of God, The love of God - Can't you see, on that tree, The love of God. He died for you, And He died for me, Can't you see, on that tree, The love of God. There for you, There for me, There for free . . . Jesus is the love of God. I would play that song over and over, that New Year's Eve, all night long and well into the morning, crying in the dark as the Lord whispered into my heart over and over, "I love you, My child. You're a treasure to Me, and I love you."

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Cape Town, South Africa, 2000. I woke this morning with such incredible lightness of heart, I feel like I'm dancing on the moon or something. Starting off the day sitting in the African sun with a cup of African coffee, praying and thanking - how can life possibly get any better.

Funny thing, this 'lightness of heart.' It has nothing to do with circumstances - everything's the same as it was yesterday, the same as it will be tomorrow. It has nothing to do with the great weather - I woke up with it. It has nothing to do with leisure - I never work harder in my life than when I'm on these trips. It can only be one thing - the incredible mercy and grace of my loving Savior.

My prayers of late have been filled with a yearning for 'the peace that surpasses understanding,' and fresh 'anointing with the oil of joy.' I've been praying madly for the Lord to clear the darkness from my heart and mind; to implant His will, extracting mine. I've been begging the Lord for life change within me - not "Lord, heal my hurts," but the prayers that I prayed while doing 'Matthew' - "Lord, make me like you. Fill me with you - with love for people, compassion, faithfulness, joy, . . . a hunger for righteousness. Cleanse me of distractions and thoughts and feelings and reactions that are not of you. Grip every dysfunctional weed that would cause me to move in any way contrary to your will and rip it out by the roots. . . ."

Yi-ha!!!!! I love it!!!! And I can only conclude that the Lord is faithfully moving within me. It's crazy - confidence like I've rarely felt confidence; relaxation like I've never relaxed; excitement bubbling in my heart - and all for no tangible reason. No one can tell me my God isn't faithful.

Had a wonderful supper with Regardt last night. Amazing - we were sitting in a restaurant surrounded by beautiful women and neither of us could care less. We were just so excited about the promise of God and the hope to which we are called. He's such a tremendous guy, Regardt - so incredibly aware of the grace of God, so incredibly aware of his undeserving and unrighteousness outside of Jesus. Speaking of a brother who had miserably, blatantly, and unrepentantly sinned, Reg responded, "If I was to be judged by my failures, . . ." Wow - such rare humility and compassion. And then he said another thing - a thing I've never heard from anyone's lips before: "All I know is that I'm so in love with God." It took my breath away - the absolute passion in his voice when he said it. Praise God!

So, I move into this day so incredibly thankful for my life and all that it is, and all it holds. If I never make another movie - hallelujah! If I make a dozen more movies - hallelujah! If I spend the rest of my life serving hamburgers over a coffee shop counter - hallelujah, hallelujah!! I'm a child of the living God, and for this day at least, I'm so shockingly aware of the value that that is.

"Bring it on, Lord, whatever you've got for me. I'm throwing myself on your grace today, and I know beyond knowing that you'll never leave or forsake me; that as long as I'm truthfully seeking, there are no mistakes, no missing anything - just You, You, and more You!!" Glory!

         

Gauteng, South Africa. What an absolute privilege my life is. With all the wondering and questioning and second-guessing of this speaking ministry choice that goes on so often (especially of late) in my head, every once in a while the value of it becomes so strikingly obvious, and it is in those moments that my peace and confidence soar to the place I know the Lord would have me rest in 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. It is in those times that I have no doubt about who I am, what my life is about, and why.

It was just a couple weeks ago I sat with one of my spiritual overseers and he all but told me that I must no longer spread myself so thin with speaking, but focus on putting out more movies and books - resources that will serve far more people and for long after I'm gone.

It sounded so right. So right that this whole Africa trip, in spite of the astounding results, I always drive back to the inn wondering if I'm properly using my time and energies.

But you know, this morning I walked into the most forsaken high school in the middle of the most forsaken, crime-ridden, drug-infested, poverty-stricken community. There were security bars on every doorway and hell-ridden graffiti on every wall. There wasn't one window that wasn't broken, and from what I could see in their eyes - teachers and students alike - not one spirit that wasn't crushed with it all.

The principal cried as she talked of the suicide, and drunkenness, and, and, and . . . She cried as she spoke of the need for Godly influence. She just cried and cried.

So there I stood in the morning cold, in front of 1000 soul-hungry, angry, neglected kids, 99% of them a horror story of abandonment in one way or another.

How does one possibly share hope in such overwhelming hopelessness? How does one share promise in such glaring disappointment? How does one share redemption in such depth of devastation? How does one share Jesus?

As I stood there, I had no answer for those questions. All I knew was that I was standing there and 1000 faces were staring back at me. I thought, "Once I mention Jesus these kids are gonna roll their eyes and laugh their heads off." I still can't fathom how, but instead they just froze, transfixed, some fighting tears. I still can't fathom how, but probably half of them received Jesus as savior.

You know, we're always asking God for miracles, but we're missing it completely. This morning I saw 500 of them in the blink of an eye. Salvation - the big-time miracle.

We arranged for an ongoing discipling relationship with that school through a local church. They will go in every week and serve the kids, guide them, and give them the foundation to see their decisions through in the practical. These kids now have a hope - the hope of eternal life, and the hope of a future in this life.

And through it all, as I sit here writing, I understand fully who I am and why I do what I do. Yes, the movies and books reach many people, but these are kids who may never own a VCR, who may never have the reading skills to concentrate on a book. These are kids that no one bothers to go to.

But, I'll tell you, right now I'm smiling from ear to ear, because, at the very least, these are now kids that have one thing - somewhere, some-One - to whom they can now go who will "never leave or forsake' them, who has a "future and a hope" for them, and who loves them with "an everlasting love" - Jesus.

         

Gauteng, South Africa. There's something about this country - about Africa in general. It's difficult to put a finger on, let alone put into words, but it's unlike any place in the world.

As the sun was setting and I walked across the grounds of the Farm Inn where I'm staying, traditional Tswana singing spilled from an open door. At the same time, the uniquely 'raw' smell of the surrounding 'bushveldt' flooded my senses.

I just smiled in myself and thought, "Africa." It was a good thought, and for the first time since I arrived in Cape Town Thursday, emotionally, physically, and spiritually exhausted, I felt that peace of "You're in the right place and everything's going to be great, kid."

This morning my first two meetings took place at 7:45 and 10:00 am, after a sleepless night of staring at the ceiling fan turning slowly over my head.

Not a very alive start, but I ministered at two separate high schools, probably seeing 2000 students, not to mention faculty and staff. I'll tell you, if I was half awake going into those meetings, I was bouncing off the walls coming out. Hundreds responded to the calls for salvation. Praise Jesus!

Funny thing is, it's got to be the simplest ministry around. I roll out of bed, throw on a pair of shorts and T-shirt, drop a Bible in my pocket, talk about Jesus for 20 minutes here and 20 minutes there, and see God touch lives like I can't describe. . . Then I go find a cafe and have lunch. Unbelievable!

I've been doing this for five years now, and it astounds me as much today as when I began. To see 1000 high school kids sit in pin-drop silence as if they've never heard of Jesus in their lives - I'll tell you, only the Holy Spirit can do a thing like that.

So what does a guy do to top off a day like that? He goes back to his room, takes a bath, watches the news, and does his laundry. Sweet reality - right back down to earth!

Tomorrow is Boys Town in Magaliesburg, Willow Ridge High School, and a radio interview at night. Hopefully I'll find time in the afternoon for a workout, and an empty computer to check with home.

I miss home. It was not always this way, especially when I began. It was all just one grand adventure that made home seem like a total bore.

But that has changed. Having dinner last Saturday with Dad and Mom, my brother and his family - I could have sat there all night long. And as grand as the adventure still is, it is only by God's grace that I am not consumed by the loneliness that is the price I pay for it.

I have been told there are two lions on the property where I'm staying. I have not seen them as yet, but tonight as I drift to sleep, I will listen for their distant, hungry roars. Africa!