December 8 - LONDON.
Heathrow Airport on a lay-over
between Johannesburg and L.A. It can be
quite a challenge, ministry in Oukasie, SA,
especially this time of year. December in
SA is officially given the title "Festive
Season" (yes, Christ(mas) has been
officially removed from His own
celebration), and that pretty much means
wanton revelry, drunkenness, violence... you
name it.
Truthfully,
I'm not exaggerating in the least. In fact,
driving into the township of Oukasie, as
many times as I've seen "it," it was so off
the scale this past weekend I thought,
"Surely this must be what hell is like."
And right in line with it all, only half of
our buses showed up on Friday night, leaving
hundreds stranded at bus stops throughout
the villages, waiting for hours. The
reason? The dispatcher passed out before he
could complete his dispatches. And not only
that, but most of the buses that did show
up, the drivers were not much better. I
tell you, it's an absolute miracle no one
was hurt. Thank You, Jesus.
Saturday
morning the hellishness continued. Hundreds
of teenagers were left standing at bus
stops, also waiting for hours for buses that
never arrived--waiting for bus drivers who
were busy "being festive" at the local
taverns. I cannot tell you how my heart
broke for those kids. They "live for" these
Saturdays when we gather them for a service,
a good meal, and a sports tournament. Their
lives are so routinely bombarded with
hardship and disappointment, and then this.
Oh Father, have mercy...
Man, my heart
was broken for those kids. We've had loads
of these kinds of challenges in the past,
but for some reason this time it was a
little too much, I confess. It really
knocked the wind out of me, and so I found
myself a quiet little side-room at Oukasie
Community Hall--an auditorium that should
have been rocking with 2000 teens but
instead stood virtually empty--and did the
only thing I could think of doing (it's all
I can ever think of doing), pray, and pray,
and pray...
It's something
the Lord has really been impressing on me of
late--the ongoing, constant battle for the
throne of our lives. So many things always
trying to rule our lives--the challenges,
the struggles, the doubts and confusions,
the disappointments and hurts... Even more
so, the wants and supposed needs;
impatience, tiredness, sickness... all these
different things, always seating themselves
on the throne of our lives, our focus, our
hearts.
Yes, a person
may be fully and deeply born again, and
still rarely have Jesus/the Spirit of God
sitting on the throne--the throne of his
thoughts and feelings, choices and
decisions, relationships and pursuits, his
outlook and perspective... And that's not
to mention the constant lies of the enemy
that try to swarm our thought lives and
press us into discouragement, fear, and
disillusionment--that try to contradict our
knowledge of God and His heart and love and
power.
These battles
are especially intense at times like that
Saturday morning in Oukasie--so tired/jet
lagged, so heartbroken for the people, so
overwhelmed by the literal anarchy that
assaulted my senses at every turn out
there. I just thank God I've learned to see
the danger coming, and just pray and pray
and worship and worship until Jesus is back
where He needs to be--ruling me through and
through. Glory to Jesus!
So there I was
in this room praying, pacing and praying,
and I heard the door quietly creak open.
There were about 50 teens who had arrived by
walking, taxis, and other transportation.
One of them popped his head through the
door, then sensitively tip-toed in. Then
another, and another... until all of them
filled the room, lining its walls in a
circle of silent reverence.
One of the
African leaders, a high school teacher named
Umpule, had told them to gather in the room
along with me. It was beautiful--where I
was so down and feeling defeated, she just
took the reigns and "went for it." Thank
God for Umpule. Glory to Jesus!
Umpule
explained to the kids that even though there
were problems we still needed to worship
God--that we couldn't allow the enemy to
defeat us. She told them to start singing
in worship--and that's when the "magic"
kicked in...
The way the
Africans worship God is truly stunning. One
of them--any one of them--just belts out a
chorus, and entirely unrehearsed, the others
join in the most breathtaking harmonizing.
It goes on and on, and takes all sorts of
dimensions and dynamics. Truly, schooled
and accomplished musicians would struggle to
duplicate what these people do as naturally
and effortlessly as you and I change socks.
So the kids
began to do this harmony thing. I couldn't
understand any of the words they were
singing, except for one: Jesu.
Over and over, "Jesu, Jesu, Jesu," and there
in the middle of all the hell of bus failure
and Oukasie revelry, the manifest presence
of God filled that room like I've rarely
experienced. It was just me, Umpule, and a
handful of African teenagers--and God just
came, and came, and came. Glory to Jesus!
It was
everything in me not to cry as suddenly, all
there was for me--my whole world--was
"Jesu." There was no street madness or
heartbreak, no drunken defeat, no
challenges waiting for me back home...
There was just Jesus--His goodness, His
glory, His power, His promise of kingship
and redemption no matter what.
There was just
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, and somewhere in the
middle of that reality something in the
spiritual--something in the rulership
of circumstance--"broke." It sounds so
strange to say--and it is so unexplainable
(well, you know what I mean) but suddenly
everything was suddenly ok. In my heart and
spirit I just knew it--whatever darkness had
been running rampant over our efforts, it
was over.
Pastor Martin
arrived about a half hour later and totally
confirmed it. The first thing he said to me
when he walked in was, "There's a change in
the atmosphere, brother. The darkness is
broken. Can you feel it?" We both knew
that the "battle" was over, that our Savior
was victorious, and that from then on, the
only thing we would see is His glory! Glory
to Jesus!
And glory we
say. The enemy was so shockingly defeated!
I ended up speaking and ministering to the
kids who had gathered, and the smallness of
the group opened the door for some real
personal ministry and attention-- something
that they really needed--something that
would not have happened if the buses did
their job and things worked out like we'd
envisioned. I tell you, God blessed those
kids' socks off!
Then came the
evening service with all the buses suddenly
running beautifully, and the room packed
out. We began to sing a song, "Thy kingdom
come, thy will be done..." and something
happened that I've never ever even
imagined. It was so unimaginable that I'm
not really sure I can say exactly what it
was that happened. It wasn't like the
manifest presence of God--it was something
"more," and different. The closest I can
come to describing it is to say it was like
His kingdom actually did come. It
was like we were singing, "Thy kingdom
come," and His kingdom came. Glory to
Jesus!
It happened
right in the middle of singing--a very
definable, definite, specific moment. One
second it was singing/worshipping and the
next it was, well, like an explosion of joy
and celebration, though those words don't
come close to conveying it.
The whole room
rose to this extraordinary level of
celebration, all at the same time, all
entirely spontaneous--literally from a human
level of worship and gladness to an
explosion of something "beyond."
Dancing broke
out across the room, and people were falling
to their faces, and crying out in worship,
worship, worship. In the front row there
were these somewhat "dignified"
visitors--three black and one white--and
where they had been so reserved the entire
service, they suddenly exploded, the
Africans dancing frantically and this one
white woman weeping uncontrollably. One of
the teens had this plastic trumpet he'd
brought for the soccer match earlier in the
day, and he began blasting it and blasting
it, dancing up/down the aisles. The whole
place--literally everyone there--just
erupted in joy--and at the same time there
was complete "order" (it's so impossible to
explain), utter cleanness, and truly
pure, holy, righteous, godly joy.
I know I'm
failing to even come close to painting any
kind of accurate picture--I'm so sorry for
that. But it was a truly extraordinary
thing that happened. The phrase that keeps
coming to me is, "We cried out for His
kingdom, and His kingdom came, and His
kingdom was joy." Glory to Jesus.
And it
wouldn't stop--it went on forever. As it
was late and the buses run on a schedule,
Pastor Martin took the microphone and tried
to bring it to a close, but the people
wouldn't let him. They just wouldn't stop
celebrating. Even Pete, the interpreter,
was just dancing and dancing, completely
abandoning his interpreting duties. The
worship team ceased to be a worship team as
well--they were all dancing all over the
platform and singing and worshipping, laying
on their faces crying out to Jesus. Martin
looked at me across the room and just threw
up his hands, laughing and laughing.
Martin was
worried that the buses would take off, so he
tried two or three more times to bring
things to a close, but still his efforts
were entirely useless. Finally he just
completely gave up. Laughing and
laughing, he walked over to me and said,
"The Holy Spirit has completely taken over,
brother. Is this not amazing!" And that's
what it was--the Holy Spirit had completely
taken over, and His dominion, His desire,
His will... was joy. Glory to
Jesus.
Sunday's
service was remarkable as well, and on
Monday we gathered the teens that had been
abandoned on Saturday. Again, the
"intimacy" of the relative smallness of the
group opened the doors for tremendously
personal ministry. Kids testified, one
after the other, about how God had changed
their lives. We ministered specifically to
the kids who never knew a father (by far the
majority of them) and you couldn't imagine
the tears as Jesus reached into their hearts
with healing. Some of them were hardened
kids with serious criminal pasts--and there
were just tears, and tears, and tears.
Glory to Jesus!
So, in short,
Jesus took His throne despite every effort
of hell to knock Him off it. As Jesus
was invited in worship, (if I may) the
enemy's butt was kicked and kicked hard,
from here to the bottom of whatever barrel
he belongs in. Truly, it was like he
ran for his life, tail tucked between his
wicked little legs. We worshipped, and
worshipped, and it was "over."
God's kingdom came. Glory to the Name of
Jesus!
Worship God,
children of God. I don't care what it feels
like or what is happening in circumstances
or how much you don't feel like it--worship
God. Do whatever it takes to get past
yourself and all the self that we all have
in us and all the self that's all around us
all the time, and humble yourself before
Him, and cry out to Him, and cry out to Him,
and never stop, and never stop... and I can
promise you, He'll "blow you away."
Go for it,
guys--really. Worship Him, and worship
Him--it's the only thing to do.
Next stop,
home! Yippee! Adventures upon adventures!
Glory to the Name of Jesus!
Go To Top
November 18 - NORTH HOLLYWOOD, CA.
Ok, rest of America, eat your hearts out...
It's 84 degrees outside as the sun beams through
my open door/windows, as I sit here in my
favorite shorts and t-shirt, as the squirrels
chase each other through the trees in my yard
and the weather-confused birdies don't know
whether they should start
building nests ("Didn't we just do this a couple
of months ago, guys?"). Glory to Jesus!
Forgive me, but I
just couldn't resist. It's the fall/winter
so-cal weather I live for. Give me my
year-round softball and my year-round sun!
Glory to Jesus! Hee hee hee!
Ok, enough (better
be careful or I'll lose some supporters!). But
on the serious side of this weather thing (here
comes the segway...) there's nothing I enjoy
more than taking that first cup of coffee out to
the porch for an early morning prayer session in
the early morning sun. Man, the Lord "speaks"
to me in those time! And what is He speaking to
me these days? Over and over, the same and the
same... "Worship, worship, worship." Glory to
Jesus!
2 Chronicles
20:21, 22, 23... "After consulting the people,
Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the LORD
and to praise him for the splendor of his
holiness as they went out at the head of the
army, saying: "Give thanks to the LORD, for his
love endures forever." As they began to sing
and praise, the LORD set ambushes against the
men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were
invading Judah, and they were defeated."
All they did was
worship God (please, please, hear the heart of
the Lord in this next phrase), AND HE DID
EVERYTHING ELSE. He flexed His remarkable and
righteous right arm and with a flick of His holy
wrist, wiped out everything that stood in their
way--everything that stood in opposition to
them--everything that desired to cut them off
from the fullness of God's hope and desire for
their lives--everything that was meant to crush
and destroy and cut them off from God's
best--everything that opposed the nature of God
and the operation of His goodness in their
natural existence--and on, and on, and on...
Glory to the living God!
If I may push the
point a bit, because I have to tell you, it's
the "point of points," and oh, if we could only
"get it." All they did was worship Him,
acknowledging who He truly is. And all
He did was "be that"--be who He truly is--who
so few of us realize He truly is. Oh Father,
forgive us. And again, glory to Jesus!
These days I stand
at the door of a great impossibility--The
Gospel According to John. I don't say that
with any sense of panic or even question
regarding it's eventual fulfillment--as God has
led, God will do. And if indeed He has led, He
will undoubtedly, uncompromisingly,
unequivocally, miraculously... do! Why?
Because that's who He is! Glory to Jesus!
So when I say
"impossibility," I'm just acknowledging
the irrefutable reality that in human
strength and capability, I may as well be
talking about walking on Mars--tomorrow!
Glory to Jesus!
But with God "all
things"--even the impossible things--"are
possible." And may I add, even more than
possible--they're in fact, "done." Glory to
Jesus! It's something He showed me once in
prayer and the Word--at the cross it was all
completed. Everything that opposes Him and we
who are in Him was put under His feet. Every
good work was completed. Every good purpose was
accomplished. Every good future was secured and
sealed... all in the blood of our precious
Jesus.
Oh, if we only
knew what we "had" in Him--the security, the
promise, the power, the kinship, the holiness,
the beauty, the rest, the love, the value; the
peace "not as the world gives," the gapingly
open doors... If we only knew who He really
is--the security, the promise, the power, the
kinship, the rest, the love, the value; the
"peace not as the world gives," the gapingly
open doors... with all we know of Him, if we
only knew... Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.
So I stand at the
threshold of the impossible--no different than
the armies that faced Jehoshaphat that day.
They had no recourse but to turn to God--oh,
glorious recourse, to turn to God! All the
weapons in the world couldn't have saved them
just as all the skills in the world couldn't
accomplish what I'm trying to do. And so
they worshipped, and worshipped, and
worshipped. And God was God, and God, and more
God... and He says, "Worship Me, My child. It's
all you need do. Just worship, and worship, and
worship. Stand back, and watch, and be utterly
amazed--and worship, and worship, and worship."
It's the simple
"strategy" God has laid before me--the road He's
shown me to walk--the road that will get me
where He's shown me I'm to go: To lay myself
before Him and worship Him. To look to Him, and
cry out to Him, and long for Him, and press into
Him, and when He tells me to do something,
immediately obey Him... And just worship
Him, and worship Him... Be still, know that
He's God, wait patiently, be strong and take
heart, lean not on my own understanding, not by
might or power but by His Spirit... and worship,
worship, worship Him... Jesus!
"Seek first My
Father's kingdom and all these things will be
given to you," Jesus said (Sermon on the
Mount). In other words, "Worship My Father, My
children--it is the key to your everything.
Give yourself entirely to Him. Release
everything in your life that stands against
Him. Get on your face before Him, and cry out
for more of Him. Sing before Him, dance before
Him, fast and pray and prostrate yourself before
Him... Give, and give, and give, and just love
Him, and love Him, and love Him... as He so, so,
so loves you." Glory, glory, glory to Jesus!
Next week I'll fly
to South Africa for a first-time ever event in
the village of Oukasie: "A Weekend of Worship &
Thanksgiving." My brother and beloved partner,
Pastor Martin says the people are coming out of
their shoes with excitement.
I remember the
day we decided on it. Martin wanted to do
something to bring all the churches together in
an event of year-end thanksgiving to God for all
the wonders He'd done in 2005. (Yes, these are
people who have little more than nothing, and
they're thanking God for what He's done in their
lives).
We were sitting in
a chain restaurant called "Spur" having lunch on
my way to the airport to fly home. I had no
plans to return to SA again in '05, but I just
got so excited as we talked. Before we knew it,
between my salad and Martin's chicken, we'd made
a plan--"A Weekend of Worship & Thanksgiving"
that would involve a service for the leaders,
three services for the community, a teen
service, and a community feeding on Sunday.
Little did we
know, as casual as that planning was, we'd
stepped right into the middle of God's "next
step" for the work in Oukasie and its precious
people. As weeks since that lunch have
progressed and word of the event has spread, it
has grown beyond our imaginings.
Martin's getting
calls from everywhere--even white church leaders
are wanting to come--something unheard of in
this area, but prayed for forever. Secular
leaders are calling. People are upset that
there's no advertising to their
villages--they're feeling left out. And what
was supposed to be a "family" get together has
blossomed into a full blown
"who-knows-what-wonders-God-will-do," and we've
got our seatbelts buckled for the
extraordinary.
We've got our
seatbelts buckled for the impossible--wonders
we've seen in the past and have no reason to
doubt will continue. I mean, white leaders are
calling and wanting to come--if you knew the
area and its history you would be falling
over--it's the impossible already happening.
Glory to Jesus!
And while I'm over
there having a ball in God's service, I don't
have to worry a bit about John and its
progress. God is doing it--not me or
anyone else. I can fully trust that the wheels
will continue to turn--and maybe at an even
faster rate because I'm not around to get in His
way!
I had the coolest
thing happen yesterday. I've decided not to
hire expensive publicists or fund-raising firms
for John, and just trust God all the
way. "His ways are not our ways," and so many
of "our ways" have more and more become so
downright "world ways." So yesterday I run over
to my church to pick up some CD's I've had
edited. Lo and behold there's a well known
media personality doing some recording in the
studio. He and I had done some shows together a
while back, so we both stopped when we saw each
other.
He asks, "What are
you up to?" and of course, I tell him about
John. Man, his eyes bugged out of his
head--he got so excited. "Send me some info!
Keep me updated!" When I got home I did just
that--emailed him some info.
Now here comes the
miracle--here comes the testimony of God "doing
it" and the ways He does things and how He's
going to take this impossible and all the
impossibles and turn them entirely around...
Without me knowing or even thinking about it--I
mean, I didn't pray for this, and, in fact, it
never crossed my mind--this guy took that info
and emailed to media personalities all
across the nation.
It's publicity I
couldn't buy for I-don't-know-how-much-money.
It's publicity most publicists could only dream
of getting and work their tails off trying to
get. Now listen to this next phrase very
carefully--let it sink deep into your heart,
because it's meant for you in whatever it is
that you might be facing... GOD JUST DID IT
SOVEREINGLY, IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE, WITHOUT
ANYONE LIFTING A FINGER.
And the living God
says, "Know Me, My child. Please understand My
heart and My capabilities. Please understand
how I feel about you, and how I desire nothing
but good, nothing but rest, nothing but
secure-ness and peace... for you.
Worship Me, My child, and watch what I'll do.
Just love Me, and love Me, and love Me... as I
so, so, so love you." Glory to the
Name of Jesus!
Next stop, Oukasie!
Next stop, The Gospel According to John!
Next stop, on my face and on my face--the most
glorious and most glorious place to be! Line up
the impossibilities! My God is HUGE! Glory,
glory, glory to JESUS!
Go To Top
October 6 - LONDON, ENGLAND.
I have rarely been so exhausted--and I have rarely
been so happy and downright excited. I have watched
God do so many wonders in this past month; watched
Him touch so many lives on so many levels and
dimensions. I've seen the healing of so many
hearts, families, and bodies as well. I've seen so
much salvation--teens, kiddies, husbands/wives,
grannies/grandpas, South Africans both black and
white, and English folks from the southern tip of
Cornwall to the little town of Bicester. I've seen
so much salvation that as I sit here in the
(finally) quiet haven of a Sheraton Heathrow hotel
room for a good night's rest before flying home, I
could just cry, and cry, and cry... Glory to the
Name of Jesus.
The adventures actually began before I even arrived
at my first stop, SA. On the long lay-over in
Heathrow I saw a sign, "Prayer Room." I had asked
God for a "quiet place" in the airport, as I know
this int'l lay-over area is elbow-to-elbow and as
noisy as all get-out. So when I saw the sign I made
a dash for it.
The prayer room was quiet, alright, though not very
nice. It was kind of dirty and, though billed as
"multi-faith," clearly leaning toward Islam. There
were prayer rugs hanging on a rack, a place to put
shoes, head coverings... Some would say that it's
not wise to be in such a place given the spiritual
dynamic of all that kind of stuff going on there,
but if there's one thing I've learned it's that God
is a whole lot bigger and more powerful than the
adversary's nonsense or some "other spirit's"
spiritual air, so in I walked and went for it,
worshiping Jesus and praying the roof off the place
for a good 2 hours.
Suddenly the door opened and in walked this very
strict Muslim old man--the whole fundamental outfit,
long beard, and everything. He took one look at me
and his eyes went huge. I was wearing shorts,
and apparently this is one of their rules--in prayer
especially, a man's legs must be covered from the
ankle on up. So off the top he was not so pleased.
But the guy was so nice. He came over and sat down
next to me. "Are you praying?" he asked, explaining
the shorts rule to me. I told him I wasn't
Muslim--that I was praying to Jesus. Well, if his
eyes were not huge at first... But it was
amazing--God just gave me total favor with the guy
and we ended up sitting and chatting there in the
prayer room for a good 30 minutes.
He
was from Pakistan, and very "orthodox" in his
faith. We laughed and chatted--he kept mentioning
that I ought to cover my legs and I told him that my
God was more concerned with the state of a man's
heart than outside trappings. No, this didn't make
much of an impression on him as I'm sure you're
hoping the story goes, but that's ok.
We
shared our faiths back/forth, him trying to convince
me and me, hopefully, just showing him the love of
Jesus more than talking about it, and just being
gracious and caring, light-hearted and non-judging;
taking him where he's at, sharing truth, and just
trusting God that if this was this guy's moment I
could depend on the Holy Spirit to do what all my
words could never do--touch his heart for Jesus.
Yes, if there's one thing I've learned, it's that
it's all His Spirit and zero me or
whoever else it might be. And I can trust that God
desires this guy far more than I desire to reach
him, and I can rest in that completely.
So
this guy and I (and my shorts) had a long and
lovely chat. I left the room so he could pray and
when he came out he sat with me and we talked for
another hour. We talked about everything from our
faiths, to the war, to his president, Musharaf, to
the Muslim fundamentalists and their acts of horror
(he despised them, by the way--said they were mad
men).
So, at the end of the day, he hopefully walked away
having 1) heard the truth of Jesus, 2) tasted His
love and lack of condemnation, and 3) enjoyed his
first "American." Funny, but he kept saying, "I
like you. You're a good man. You just need to
cover your legs." We would just laugh and laugh.
And you know, God will touch his life. Seeds were
sown (perhaps not for the first time in his life),
and I just have to trust the bigness of God and the
bigness of His hope and love for this man. I just
have to believe it was no "chance" encounter, and
God will do what only God can do--change
a life for all eternity! Glory to His Name!
So, the ministry began before I ever took a
platform, but then it was off to "Adventures in
Oukasie!" Glory to Jesus! I tell you, there just
are no words to describe a week like I had in
Oukasie. God has again far exceeded our hopes and
expectations. Pator Martin and I were both
astounded, night after night--astounded both by the
mass of healing and the way God did it--He just sovereignly
touched lives during worship--just touching the
people as they sat in their seats. You could
actually see it happening all through the hall. It
happened every night, and it was
mind-blowing--something I wouldn't believe if I
hadn't seen it with my own eyes.
And night after night the people would come and
share their testimonies. "God healed me of this,"
"God healed me of that..." "God healed me during
the singing." "God healed me while the message was
being preached." "God healed me when the pastors
prayed..." It went on and on--and it was marvelous.
But far beyond that--the redemption of souls!
The salvation was literally massive, night
after night. We hardly lifted a finger--some nights
I only spoke for 10 or 15 minutes. Some nights God
would give me a handful of Scriptures to share with
the people, and that would be all I did--just speak
out the Word and tell them of His love. Martin
would take the microphone and just give a simple
call--and the people would flood forward!
They would just come, and come, and come... TO
JESUS! Glory to Jesus!
There was a man whose kids were going to the kiddies
crusade. Every night they would come home excited
and full of the good things Jesus deposited in them
through Sharon's ministry and that of the African
teachers she'd trained. He was so blown away by
what he saw in his kids he decided to come and check
it all out for himself. Now an entire
household--dad, mom, kiddies, teens, granny... are
all children of God, freed by the blood of Jesus!
Glory to His blessed Name!
I
could tell scores of stories like that one. There
was the tough teen that was causing trouble. The
pastors grabbed him and took a huge knife off him.
They sat him in the front row where he couldn't do
harm, and the next thing we knew he was giving his
life to Jesus. On Sunday I saw him helping the
pastors erect the tent for the feeding of the
kiddies. From weapon-wielding criminal to child of
God to servant of God in 2 days. Glory to Jesus!
Then there was the little boy I saw standing up
front giving his life to Jesus, his little arms
raised, such serious sincerity on his face. The
sight was so "arresting" to me, when he finally
opened his eyes I motioned for him to come over to
me. He was kind of shy and I asked him, "How many
years are you?" "9 years." "Did you understand
what I was saying when I was talking?" "Yes." "Why
are you standing up front like this?" "I want
Jesus."
And that's the bottom line--"I want Jesus."
That was what I saw over and over, night after
night, in life after precious life. It is the
greatest adventure a man can imagine. "I want
Jesus." Glory to Jesus!
But the hits didn't stop there. It was on the the
UK where I discovered that God was only warming up.
Every UK meeting was "dripping" with the "presence"
of God. It's hard to explain, but in one service,
at one point, I was talking and it was like i saw
this "thing" come over every face in the audience.
It wasn't something I saw physically, but more an
awareness of tremendous vulnerability, and it was so
very fragile--like the collective hearts in the room
were so open and so exposed to a
breathtakingly rare and extraordinary degree.
I
was afraid to move--afraid to upset it. It was like
a feather could hit the ground and upset it, it was
so incredibly fragile. I'd never seen anything like
it before. I stopped and called the pastor over.
He's a guy who's very sensitive to the Spirit of
God, and I all I said was, "Do you see it?" He
looked at the people and said, "Yes." I suggested
that we stop and just pray for the people, and let
the Lord do what He was doing in their hearts.
So
right there in the middle of my message I just
stopped. The leaders just surrounded the
congregation in prayer--and it was "pandemonium."
The Lord began touching people left and right, all
over the room. It was breathtaking, driving to the
knees, awesome, fearsome... to see God reach so
lovingly and completely into people's lives.
At
one point I felt God showing me that loneliness had
become like a vice grip on many people in the room.
I took the microphone and mentioned it, and I tell
you, it was even more scary. People literally,
physically shook--and then to see God minister in
release, peace, rest, healing... It went on and
on... and it was remarkable.
That was Cornwall. In Wolverhampton it was a night
of salvation--a teenage girl and her father, an
Indian "Sikh," another teenage girl and an older
white woman who'd been brought to the meeting by a
caring black couple... it was beyond beautiful--and
again, glory to Jesus.
Bicester was a ministry to me, in the sense that by
then my gas tank was long on empty. I had nothing
to give and didn't know how I was going to get
through it. But the cross-denominational unity I
saw there; the quality of "feet on the ground"
brothers and sisters, and the simple love of God in
worship... It lifted me and ministered to my
exhausted soul.
The room was packed with folks from across every
denominational and cultural line. People were
hungry for Jesus in Bicester--and people were
saved. One young guy--a real handsome kid of
20--came and spoke to me after. He'd given his life
to Jesus, and what a wondrous future he has
now--what hope and what value. It's just Jesus,
Jesus, and more Jesus. The whole trip was Jesus,
Jesus, and more Jesus! Glory to the Name of Jesus.
And so here I sit, tucked into the quiet of a warm
hotel room, having had a nice, hot shower, and ready
to bed down for a good, long sleep... and just
smiling, and smiling even more. Glory to Jesus!
John has been announced--and what a day
that was! It was a day I'd long prayed for and
worked toward--for years. It was funny,
though, that day. I was in Cornwall ministering--it
was that day that "vulnerable thing" happened in the
room and I just stopped speaking. It was such an
extraordinary day in that regard and in the regard
of the John landmark that it was...
At
the same time it was so shockingly "ordinary." It
was ordinary in the sense that pretty much every day
for me has become so incredibly extraordinary. It's
just simply the life God has given me--part of the
beauty He's given me for all my ashes--watching His
Spirit touch lives, enjoying the mind-blowing
adventure of His kingdom, participating in these
precious things, purpose off the scale, fun off the
scale, experience off the scale...
How did it all happen? When did it begin? He did
it--that's how it happened. And it began the day I
cried out to Him, "Jesus, You've got to save me!"
Glory to the Name of Jesus!
It's the adventure of God's kingdom--of being a
child of God and having access to all that He is in
all His remarkable ways--access for the day to day,
and access for the once in a lifetime.
It's the adventure of God's kingdom in not limiting
Him or selling Him short in any way--just looking to
Him, and looking to Him; laying everything big and
small at His feet and pressing on "toward the goal
He has won for us in Jesus."
He
is God, and He is "there" (Jehovah Shama) as we seek
Him, and seek Him... and watch him do what only He
can do: Wonders and more wonders! Glory to
the Name of Jesus!
Next week there's Chicago, then Texas, then I can't
remember where. December will bring another Oukaise
event--a ministry to the body this time, as opposed
to outreach. We're calling it "A Weekend of Worship
and Thanksgiving," so you'd better get your African
dancing shoes on.
Funny, but even though we aren't "thinking"
outreach, just you watch what God does. The
"not-yet-in-Jesus" will come, no doubt about it.
Lives will be healed and saved, and healed and
saved--God always doing that "exceedingly abundantly
above and beyond" thing that He is so good
at, and so loves to do.
And of course it's time to dive fully into John.
The road I've traveled all these years leading up to
John has been long and hard. At the same
time, the road has been watching God part one Red
Sea after another. The road ahead will probably
be even harder--I mean, if I sat back and thought
about it with my head instead of my faith I'd
probably run like the wind. I mean, talk about
"impossible."
But if there's one thing I've learned, it's in that
place of the impossible where God thrives. He
loves the impossible, for it is only in that
place of the impossible where His children
really cry out to Him, and where He truly gets
all the glory.
He
has done it so far, carrying me to this point. And
truly, if you knew the whole story you'd know that
all I've done, really, is pray. And so that will be
my continuing "strategy" as we turn this exciting
corner toward financing John and
production: I will pray, and pray, and
pray. He will do it---He's so shockingly good, and
so shockingly faithful, and so shockingly,
shockingly, shockingly GOD. Glory to the
wondrous Name of Jesus!
"Here we go, Lord! Thanks for so much fun and
adventure of the past month. You blow my mind,
Lord--and as I write that, I can't help but think
you're smiling and saying, 'Kid, I haven't even
begun!'
I
love You, Lord. I love You, I love
You..." America, here I come! Glory to the Name of
Jesus!
Go To Top
August 31 - NORTH HOLLYWOOD, CA.
Genesis 18:13, 14.... "And the Lord said to
Abraham... 'Is anything too hard for the LORD?...'"
Sometimes
what strikes me more than anything in the Word of
God--in His message to you and me, in His hope for our
lives and His plan for our lives--is the utter "feet on
the
ground," anything-but-lofty, uncomplicated practicality
of it all.
I mean,
here's the living God speaking in as
clear and "un-mysterious" a tone as it can possibly
get. He's speaking to Abraham in the middle of what
seemed "too hard" to him 3000 years ago, and to you and
me today in whatever we might be facing... "Is
anything too hard for Me?"
"Of course
not, Lord," you and I answer. And He continues...
"Then
rest, My child. Walk forward in calm and hope. I'm a
whole lot bigger than that thing, and there is no
question where My heart is at. There is no question
that I love you. There is no question of My will.
Cease
your questions, child--and walk. Rise
in confidence--not of who you are, or your spirituality,
or your commitment to Me, or your relative
righteousness, or your knowledge of The Word, or your
work on My behalf, or, or, or... but confidence in
ME--in who I AM, in MY strength and MY commitment to
you, in MY righteousness and perfection of faithfulness
and power to move worlds with less than a thought. Put
your confidence in ME, child. I AM, and nothing is too
hard.
Only your
heart, My child, can often be too hard. As soft as it
is, it can be too hard--too hard to bow entirely before
Me, too hard to entirely let go so that I can fully
exercise the fullness of Me in this place, in your life,
in this thing that you're afraid might be too big for
Me; in your heart, in the direction of your life, in
your relationships, in your decisions and choices, in
your pursuit of Me.
Are you
still so afraid that I will take you places you don't
want to go? Do you still, deep down inside, think I
might 'ruin' your life? Be free from that 'religious
residue,' child; that tragic distortion of My truth and
heart.
I love
you--that is the sum total of My thoughts toward
you. And My faithfulness is PERFECT--I have never not
been faithful, even in your darkest times of running
from Me. And there is NOTHING that is too hard for Me,
child--NOTHING. Name anything and I will tell you, 'It
is not too hard for Me.'
I am for
you, My child. I love you, I 'know,' and it is not too
hard for Me." Glory to God on high!
I've just
enjoyed the awesome pleasure of a week of fasting and
prayer--of really putting things aside--good things,
ministry things, all things--to seek, and seek, and
seek... To lay myself at His feet and cry out for His
bigness and depth in my heart and life. I spent the
week "craving" Him--and hopefully the end result will be
the greatest result of all: A deeper and greater craving
of Him every day of every week! Glory to Jesus!
Oh, to crave
Jesus! Oh, to be desperate for His close companionship
and involvement! Oh, to desire Him and more of Him!
"One thing I ask of the Lord, that I may dwell in
Your house all the days of my life, to gaze upon the
beauty of the Lord and to seek Him in His temple"
(Psalm 27:4). Oh, what a wondrous goal to pursue--to
"live" in that kind of hope, awareness, and desire! Oh,
glory to the living God!
And as one
would expect in the fullness of His heart that just
gives and gives... oh, how He gave me such wondrous
treasures of guidance and leadership, what to do and not
to do, how to approach this and how not to approach
that... growth in understanding His bigness and how
truly big it is when He says, "Nothing is too hard for
Me."
There is this
line in the book of Amos that has always really
struck me--truly, it sends shudders down my spine. The
way it's worded, it's as if what it talks about is the
most horrific circumstance anyone could imagine. It
speaks of famine--a famine far more devastating than not
having food or water... Amos 8:11... "'The days are
coming,' declares the Lord, 'when I will send a famine
through the land--not a famine of food or a thirst for
water, but a famine of hearing the words of the
Lord.'"
It's like,
"No, God, not that! Anything but that!" And coming off
a week of hearing so clearly from God in so many ways
both hoped for and unexpected, I couldn't agree
more. To be "Spirit-led," and knowing you're
approaching things in His leadership and not mere human
wisdom or "feelings." To confidently "lay things down"
in the clear understanding, "This is not for you." To
calmly step into arenas where you have no experience or
understanding, but only the unarguable sense that this
is something God wants me to do--to stand entirely sure
of yourself no matter what you see with your eyes
simply because you know that's where God sent you.
To just seek
and then do, and then seek, and then do... leaving
results completely "beside the point," but just enjoying
the satisfaction of knowing you heard right, and knowing
that you then "did," and that's the sum total of all
He asks for my every moment of every day.
Oh, what
precious rest I enjoyed last week! Oh, what peace! And
oh, what impossibilities I saw Him turn around--changing
hearts, granting favor, opening doors, preparing ground
before me... "Oh Father, if it takes me fasting every
single day from now till whenever, I never want
to live without what I tasted last week! I don't think
I can! I'm spoiled forever! I love You, Jesus! I love
You! Glory to Your wondrous Name!"
In these few
words of this journal entry, I want to call you and call
myself to truly "know" God. It's not something that
comes from books or seminars, or sitting in the pew
taking notes--though they all hold great value. It's
something that only comes from a truly rend
heart--a heart that is rend before His Spirit in
prayer, rend before His Word in longing, rend before Him
in abandonment to worship that takes a man to his knees
long after they start aching, arms lifted high though
they tremble in weakness. "I have seen You in Your
sanctuary, and beheld Your power and Your glory!" (Psalm
63:2). "Better is one day in Your courts than a
thousand elsewhere!" (Psalm 84:10). It is only a
rend heart that takes a man or woman to that
"place." Oh, glory to the living God!
Look at this
email I just received--read it and hear the living God
whisper, "Is anything too hard for Me?" "... I
did almost 23 years in prison at which time I never knew
Jesus. I was in my 20th year when I was in the hole for
making trouble when I asked Jesus to take my life and
make me new. Since that day I have been so blessed. I
am now married to the most wonderful woman in the
world. We own our own home and I just love to spend
time in the Bible and in Prayer..." And again the Lord
says, "Is anything to hard for Me?
I just
received a testimony from South Africa--a witch
doctor--a man steeped in darkness like you and I can't
imagine--free in Jesus and soon to enter Bible School [Testimony].
A couple of months ago, another testimony--a woman on
her death bed from AIDS--now completely well. [Testimony]. It
goes on and on and on... impossibility after
impossibility... And the living God whispers over and
over, "Is anything too hard for Me? Anything at
all?" Glory to the Name of Jesus!
In the coming
weeks, after I return from Africa and England, I will be
making a very grand ministry announcement. It will
utterly blow your mind--as it has so blown mine over and
over, and with each passing development, blows it even
more. As grand and exciting as the announcement will
be, what you don't know is the many years ago God
"showed" me that, indeed, the day of this announcement
would come.
At the time I
was surrounded by the highest walls of the most utter
impossibility--kind of like that prisoner sitting in
"the hole"--and it was there that God "showed me" that
the day would surely come. It was there that He "told"
me those walls would crumble, as today they have; that
no matter how big those walls were, He was bigger; and
that no walls could keep Him out or thwart His plans and
purposes no matter what they looked like or even felt
like. Yes, that He is God and nothing is too
big or too hard. Glory to His Name!
It was that
many years ago that God showed me to start writing a
book about it all in "real time"--to journal and
document the development from that long-ago day of
initial "prompting" in the midst of all that
impossibility, to His turning every one of them around,
and all without the slightest effort on my part, and
even in the middle of my embarrassing degree of
questioning and doubt, confusion and struggle. (Yes, I
confess, no "mighty man of faith" in this guy--just a
sinner saved by His grace, crying out and doing my
best. Glory to Jesus!).
It will be a
tremendous testimony to the bigness of God, the
faithfulness of God, the love of God, the power of God,
the wonder of His ways... It will be a testimony in
which no man will be able to take credit or
glory--only the living God. All glory
to the living God! And again, the bottom line...
"Is anything too hard for Me?"
Oh, my
brother, my sister... cry out to the living God. Walk
in His wonder. When you stumble as we all do, get right
back up and lift your hands in praise. Look to Him--not
to "that." Know Him, and be free of "that."
Don't try to
figure this out and orchestrate that... Don’t sit
around wondering or looking around every corner. Just
fall on your face, rend your heart in worship, cry out
and cry out... and then rest, and rest--in Jesus, you
rest.
It's all you
need do; your entire "work." Then you stand, and you
watch--maybe for a day or maybe for a lot of days--but
one way or another the day comes when you stand utterly
amazed, "Oh my goodness, look what God did." And He
smiles in return, "I told you, My child--nothing is
too hard for Me!" Glory, glory, glory to Jesus!
"No, Father,
nothing is too hard for You. And please forgive me for
so seldom "living in" that, and so often living as if it
wasn't so. Oh Father, how it must grieve You to be so
misunderstood, so underestimated, so "replaced" by mere
human endeavor, wisdom, strength, initiative... Oh, how
tiny those things are in Your shadow! Oh, if we would
only look to You!
I thank You,
Father, for so much display of Your fullness in my life
and experience--in spite of the ways I tend to discount
You. I guess that's what it means in Your Word when it
says Your faithfulness is "perfect"--You've never not
been faithful--even in the middle of my faithlessness,
mistakes, and silliness. You are truly a wonder, Lord,
and I am so, so thankful.
I love You,
Lord. Oh, Lord, how I love You. You've carried me to
such a precious point and the lines have fallen for me
in such pleasant places... Thank You, Lord. Today I
stand in awe. I love You, Lord... I love You." Glory
to the Name of Jesus!
Go To Top
AUGUST 11 - DOWNTOWN LOS ANGELES.
It's been a long, long time since I've been here in downtown
LA--1989 to be exact. I remember I was not yet saved and I was
working on a short-lived TV show (that will go un-named, of
course. "Ahem, ahem!"), and I was so excited about
it.
It was a job
that represented the coming together of all the reasons I got
into making films. There was the "grit" and "real life"
of being on location, and so "in the streets." Then the
character I played was "gritty" as well--real urban, real "Al
Pacino-ish." It's a character opportunity that an actor rarely
gets to explore, and back in those days when acting was my whole
life (looking back now it's so hard to imagine such a thing)
that was a great artistic thrill.
Then, of
course, it was a well paying job, which doesn't hurt, if you
know what I mean. It was a time when I was kind of "on a roll,"
going form one show to another, building a reputation in the
industry. My pay scale was going up more and more, and so I was
truly in the early stages of "living my dream," and I couldn't
have been more happy.
One funny
thing--I remember standing on that set, waiting to shoot one of
my scenes, and I leaned on this "phone box." Little did I know
it was a fake phone box--a prop. It was just setting out there
on the street and it was so real I had no idea. It was made out
of cardboard and balsa wood, and as you can guess, it crumbled
and I went down with it. The prop department wasn't too happy
with me, but it got such a big laugh from everyone all was
forgiven. Too, too funny...
So you flash
forward to today. I sit very near that same street where the
phone box collapsed and I got paid so well to do my Pacino-ish
best. But now I'm a man born again--born into the wondrous
kingdom of the living God--washed in the blood of Jesus! Glory
to His Name! Now I'm a man with very different dreams, and a
very different idea of what "thrilling" is. I'm a man who has
had the breathtaking opportunity to represent Jesus in books, on
film, in ministry... My goodness--what God does with the scraps
of a man's life is astounding. And again, glory to Jesus!
And the
funniest thing, the irony of it all (man, God is a trip), is
that what I'm doing here in these streets today is the exact
same thing I was doing in 1989. Where I was working as an actor
on a TV show back then, today I'm filming Faith Happens,
a feature that will glorify God and draw people to salvation--a
feature born not of human greed and human genius, but born of
the kingdom of God in the hearts of humble men who are bowed
before His throne in glorious service--men who want to see Jesus
exalted and His children saved. Oh, what joy to work with such
men! Glory to the Name of Jesus!
And the irony
continues... Back then when I was pretty much type-cast in that
Pacino, edgy kind of thing, today I couldn't get that kind of
role if my life depended on it. In fact, my scenes today are
all about my character reaching out with the love of Jesus to a
guy just like that--"Gino Vitarelli," a guy who is just like the
characters I used to play! Hey, maybe in this scene I'm
reaching out to my old self! Now that's a new one! Glory to
Jesus!
But truly, God
is a wonder, and so hilarious the way He brings it full circle.
I can just see Him smiling and smiling at me... "You see, kid,
I told you I had plans for you. And I didn't forget about your
love of making movies. I've got that covered all the way--I've
got everything covered all the way. You just keep walking,
kid--walk closer than close to Me, and just keep drawing
closer--and I'll continue taking care of all the rest." Glory
to Jesus!
Another thing
that is so interesting--oh, how Jesus changes a person's
heart... Like most any downtown, these LA streets are
wall-to-wall with the homeless, the drunken, the addicted, the
criminal, the destitute... I can remember back then, in '89,'
thinking it was so exciting to be mixing and rubbing shoulders
with these "street people"--again it was that "grit/reality"
thing that was so stimulating to me as an actor/artist. But
today, as I drove in, it was everything in me to restrain my
tears.
The brokenness,
and brokenness, and brokenness... It was everywhere you
looked--broken men, broken women. The darkness and the utter
lack of God. I tell you, I could go on and on, but it was
terrible, really. It was like a huge weight on my heart,
exhausting, heart-tearing, entirely consuming... Inside me,
whereas years ago I was going over my lines, today I've just
been praying and praying... "Oh Father, have mercy. Oh
Father, people need You. Oh Father, oh Father..."
Yes, I'm a long
way from that downtown day back in 1989--a long way in my hopes
and dreams, my activities and realities, my sense of fulfillment
and desires for my life, my circumstances and priorities... and
more than anything else, in my heart. If I never
really knew it before, I know it big-time today--the living God
has changed my heart. Yes, there's a long way still to go, but
oh, how He's changed my heart...
"Oh house
of Israel, can I not do with you as this potter does?" declares
the Lord. "Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in
my hand, oh house of Israel." (Jeremaih 18:6)
"I love You,
Father. I love You, Jesus." Back to work! Glory to the Name
of Jesus!
Go To Top
July 31 - BOISE, IDAHO. Every time I come to this
precious city I can't help but think of my very first visit here.
It was years ago, and I was asked to speak at their official
National Day of Prayer event, and I can tell you, it was a humbling
honor. You see, I was very new at all of this at the time--Matthew
had just been released here in the states and it was getting the
same wondrous reaction it had received in South Africa where it was
first released. God was revealing His Son to people in fresh and
"freeing" ways, reviving His children in His love and joy, and
drawing legions to salvation in His kingdom... and it was all just
plain glorious. Glory to His Name!
So there I was, speaking
on the National Day of Prayer... It was one of those, "How on earth
did I get here?" And I was just so, so thankful.
Now here I am, back in Boise, having made many ministry trips here
in between, and just serving the folks again, doing the same
"thing," if you will--Jesus, Jesus, and more Jesus. What a wonder!
Glory to Jesus!
But today is one of those
"looking back days," as I kick back in my hotel room between
services. It's one of those days where the Lord kind of lifts my
eyes to catch a glimpse of all He's done and all He continues to
do. I mean, here I've gone from that National Day of Prayer day in
Boise all the way to... well... Boise! (I couldn't resist).
But carrying the comedy
through, between Boise and Boise there has been so, so
much... Just last night I was chatting with a friend who was asking
me what this country was like, and what that country was like...
New Zealand, South Africa, Australia, Hong Kong, Italy, England...
The list of my outreach travels goes on and on, and as we were
talking it was like the Lord whispering, "Look at what I've done,
kid."
I mean, every one of
those countries and towns means souls and more souls. Not being one
to dwell on that and just keep "movin' forward," I don't often stop
and "notice it." I mean, I had no idea. What a wonder God is!
At the same time I just
received an email from a Brazilian publisher who will be
translating/distributing Jesus Wept in
Portuguese. In my wildest dreams, I never would have imagined it.
The Character of a Man will be released here in the US in
less than a year--my 5th book about Jesus. Who'd of ever thought a
thing like that would happen? Not a day goes by that I don't hear a
testimony about In the Footsteps of Jesus, all these years
after it's initial release. Mind blowing--absolutely mind
blowing. God is just plain mind blowing...
At the same time, my
assistant, Sharon, has just returned from her 7th (I think?)
ministry trip to South Africa where she shared Jesus with literally
thousands of children (yet again), conducted training for children's
leaders, looked in on the progress of our house-building project,
introduced street ministry to the mean streets of Oukasie, one of
South Africa's "hardest" African townships...
Here is a woman who has
been quietly living in the cornfields of Indiana--her "town"
isn't as long as a football field. Now here she is zipping
back/forth to Africa routinely, training a generation in Jesus. Can
you believe it?! Where does that kind of purpose and excitement
come from? How much bigger can God possibly be!
Check this out, taken
from an email I received from my African partner, Pastor
Martin, about Sharon and her work there these past weeks...
I love you my brother,
the work in Oukasie is continuing and I'm telling you Sharon has
taken over Oukasie, if I have to give you the total count of all the
kids Sharon spoke to in three days the first school it was
about 1300 the second school was about 542, the third school was
about 1200 and there is more. The street walking ministry every
day, I can't tell you the number but to say that kids are now
waiting for her on the corner before she arrives in hundreds, but
brother, now you and I need to work harder so that we can match this
woman, she is now known and loved in Oukasie in each and every
house. Kids everywhere are talking about Sister Sharon, she is
taking over, come quickly my brother so that we can get a little bit
of her glory, ha ha!
I tell you, is the
word, "wondrous," wondrous enough? "GLORY TO JESUS," is all one
can say. Glory to Jesus, I tell you... Glory to Jesus!
So just sitting here
in my Boise hotel room with a cup of coffee and my feet up,
Jesus is "going out" all over. In books, in Matthew,
in Oukasie, in Brazil... It's just Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.
Wow!
So God has really
taken me on an incredible journey--far beyond any dream I could
have ever envisioned for myself--and boy, do I know it. I spoke
to a friend last week and he asked me about a couple of
life-corners where things are not as I would want them to be--I
tell you, no matter who you are or where you're at, those
"corners" exist. But I told him, "I'm the happiest guy on the
planet, that stuff notwithstanding," and I truly meant it. I
mean, in the middle of whatever challenges or whatever (again,
as we all have), look what God has done, for crying out loud!
I told him, "If those things are my only problems, I don't have
a problem in the world!" Yippee! Glory to Jesus!
I also told him
this... "I've seen too much of real suffering to lose
myself in such relatively petty things. You sit across from a
kid in Africa who hasn't eaten in days and you realize what a
real problem looks like, and how on my worst day I'm
still living like a king, and I couldn't possibly ask more of
God. I mean, "desires and dreams" are real things, but try to
fit "no food" into your head--or no medical option, or just
lying there freezing on the dirt floor with rain pouring in from
every corner of your roof while you try to sleep; or not being
able to complete your schoolwork because you don't have a pencil
and there's no 25 cents to buy one, or having to walk 3 hours to
get to your $3/hour job each morning, or, or, or...
I just received an
email from a friend in Colorado whose brother-in-law is in the
throes of a serious cancer. He's a young man with a family...
I know another guy in Colorado who's been dealing with a brain
tumor for several years. I watched a woman on the news just now
who lost a daughter to a terrible crime...
I tell you, these
things are real problems. May I get smacked upside the
head if I ever moan or complain about my puny issues, whatever
they may be. Oh, how we who are God's children need to get out
of "my needs," and "how can I make my life wonderful," and just
get down on our knees, and cry out to God in thankfulness, and
cry out to God on behalf of others! Glory to Jesus! Amen, and
amen!
|
